forget it. wadever. i cant be bothered anymore. ppl please forget u had mi as a fren. im not a good fren. im gone. bye.

jessie siaowei i love u guys!

Yo ppl! im back. hahas. well. brought back wid mi illness too. been having fever and stomach-ache. runnin to the toilet for countless times. argh. i hate the toilet now. hahas. cant really eat anythin for the last few days. just abit of porridge. hmm. think i'll briefly talk abt my trip to malaysia. penang. hahas.

went last last thursday. first day didnt do much. went to eat. yipee! the food dere is fantastic. hor kian mee. guo tiao tang. laksa for those who really noe how to enjoy. but for mi. no thanks. hahas. char guay tiao and so on... hahas. dun think i'll say more. dun wan any saliva on the comp. lol. nth much to shop dere really. didnt even manage to buy any clothes back. boring. the most interesting part abt the trip was the trip to ipoh. we hired a van. travelled wid my family and aunt and cousins to ipoh. took ard 2 hours to reach. the caves dere was quite cool. the first few was mostly on buddism. wid the statues ard. ya. the last one was amazing. inside was pitch dark. err. not exactly. wid some lamps at the side. the cave was used by soldiers who were against the government in the past and on the wall of the caves were alot of codes. everythin inside was natural. the guy leadin us used a big torchlight pointin to all parts of the caves. on the walls of the caves. the rocks formed to be something. like a cat. mouse. drumstick. woman leg. and there was a so call paintin. formed by the urine and shit of the bats. ha. disgustin i noe. but it all dried up. its quite artistic actually. on some rocks. little bits of crystals were formed. its beautiful. but its too small. i doubt anyone can take them. hahas. my trip in the cave was only 6 rm i think. for 9 rm u could walk further on. the water underneath was crystal clear. feel like drinkin it but it cant be drank cos the water has been runnin for a long time. the rocks that wore off had somethin in them. think its calcium. theres too much in the water. so its not drinkable. anyway. u could pay 30 plus if u wanted to go all the way up the cave and come all the way down thru the water. its cool. but we had not much time and we didnt bring extra clothing. too bad. it would have been a nice experience.

hmm. dun think theres anythin more that is really interestin. basically the trip was okae but abit boring. the worse was being sick the last few days of the trip. hai. ohh well...

happy holiday everyone!

fark. i dunno wad to believe. i noe wad i saw.

perhaps everyone will be alot happier without mi entering their lives.


jetty. crown necklace. stadium.

its funny how it works, how we choose to keep out greatest fears closest to our hearts and everything else that's positive but somehow unknown to us furthest away. it's like we've somehow became an ignoramus of our own welfare and thoughts, feelings. strange, how everything associated wid failure seem to hold a significantly greater influence over us than our compliments. we've become victims of our own feelings and thoughts. how stupid it is, we've become trapped in our own spiritual quicksand, everytime we try to squirm free we are sucked in deeper. thinkin it is easier to give up rather than pushin ourselves on, unknown to us that success acheived at the end of the say overrides everything else that is sustained during the whole process. sure, it is from the failure that we learn and become a better person to our own standards, but why do we choose to keep living in the past, where not everything actually went according to plan, and how we let out past gravely influence our present and future. no one can move forward while looking behind, that's just a diaster waiting to happen inside of us, within us.

its even funnier, how failure in love gets us down, it's a feeling unexplainable to everyone. undesirable, how we are prevented from moving along with life because of these failures in love. the person you love may be furthest away physically but closest to your heart, unknown to them. it's like a fire burnin in your heart, and the only barrier which keeps this flame burning is the person you love. sometimes the person may choose to turn their back on you and extinguish this flame, and all of a sudden, your life crumbles and you feel like the world has collasped right before your eyes. suddenly, everything sems sober, black and white. it's as though you're in an enclosed room without light. you search for it to lead u out of the darkness but there's no such thing and soon enough the air becomes thinner and you die. in reality not physically, but mentally and emotionally. it robs you of your life , because you are so deeply wounded by the one you love. its like you wich you just die right there, because everything in life just seemed meaningless all of a sudden.

but, suddenly the flame is ignited once more and you feel that all is not lost. the person tou love seems to care, after all. but this could be the best thing that has happened in your life, or it could be the greatest decerption you'll ever face. deep inside, you know that although that link between you and the one you love has been restored, somewhat miraculously, the problems don't end right there. but who cares, love blinds. it can either give warm your heart tremendously or it can bite you right in your face.

its amazin how i pull thru the whole 4 yrs. at one point of a time during sec 3 i thought i'll remain there. its weird and stunning how it could be the last day of school and u dunno wad hit u. its the last day of sch and the start of the study break till O's. well well. im gonna stop rantin on and on abt studies.

prac was okae. chemistry was practically giving away marks on the observation part. was it 10 marks? think it was. and im dumb alright. not to do the graph. aww. got one of the part that i tot i didnt noe how to do right and i didnt write it down. ain't that stupid of mi! at least i'll get a few marks. forget it. its over. focus on the comin papers.

wad do i wan now. i'll add more if i can think of more. hahas

• pass the freakin o's
• get a fone instead of this lousy samsung one. i wan a flip one! LOL
• things to get better
• watch death note
• a tv wid holes to plug vcd player
• go tanning!
• go shopping. that's a gal's job. HA
• to clear this list. hee =)

there's a princess in every girl. yupp. i agree wid this statement (:(:

i wanted to write the long long blog everyone wrote in their blog. namin out everyone. but cant seem to complete it. so it'll keep it short and sweet. to the six of us. jessie ningsi siaowei jean and fen. i got to noe u guys better thru recess. well. fen and jean bah. cos jessie and ningsi are in the same class as mi. siaowei is in volleyball. the times we go out to shop. to bowl. i'll rmb them.

now for the clique. even though im not really close wid some of u. i still find u guys really fun to be wid and enjoy the moments wid u all. this group of ppl are the most crappy ones i ever known. hahas.

next the volleyball gals. i noe im not there regularly. regretted this greatly. but i really am happy to noe u ppl. its the sport that bring us all together. we started out not even abit united. but we ended up bondin and became really close. the games we played together are unforgettable. no matter wad. lets play together someday again.

whether i get to graduate this year or not. i'll not forget u guys! study hard for o level. its the last exam for us and we'll truely graduate and move on.

hold on together ppl. this is the song that was played on our graduation day. enjoy!

went to k box yesterday. sang alot. lol. so long didnt go out wid eelin xiao jie le lar. so busy now ps us le. lols. didnt go sch today again. hahas. think going tml. mock exams are so boring. hahas. how to concentrate wid the hall so hot and stuffy. lol

after doing my coursework for straight whole 15 hours. its finally done. thank u sooo much amilia! she helped mi alot alot. if not for her i think i'll still be doing. and she managed to finish her's today too. whoo! three cheers for her. hahas.

today didnt went well. horrible day for mi. havin a splittin headache now. thought of very much worse things to do to myself but didnt do it. i'll see my mood later i guess. if its still horrible. maybe a little pain or seein red liquid will help. HA.

enjoy ppl. i finally found the song i've been lookin for sooo long. the ghost of you and me by bb- mak =)

time really passes soo fast. graduation is here. omg! like huimin said. we'll miss the class. miss secretly eatin in class. usin hp in class. maybe even ms kaur confiscatin hp from us. ha. all the laughter and fun. recess wid the six of us. cuttin queue when buyin food. chicken rice. curry chicken and so on. hai. so not lookin forward to graduation. how i wish time can stop right now. even our ugly seven buttons sch uniform we're gonna miss it. nvm. we're gonna try to let this remainin one week to be one of the most memorable week. and definately gonna study wid u guys for o level.

hai. alrdy sick for three days. gotta recover quickly. hope i can go sch tml. my result sucks. dun feel like knowin the rest of my subjects. ha.

ohh gosh. feelin so unwell now. why a fever out of sudden. think all the sickness accumulated and came at one go. well. how to describe how im feelin now. in pain but not actual pain as in u got hit or somethin. overall its just terrible. wanna sleep. but cant sleep. no energy in mi now. thank goodness the last few papers are tml. hope i'll be well enough to do them well. think a sorethroat is comin too. shoo! go away...

ohh yes. choices are made by us people. no one can force u to choose somethin or go which direction. one of the most afraid things i hate to do is to make a choice. ppl close to mi will noe how im like. till the very last min. i wun be able to be make a choice. one thing is. afraid of regrets. afraid of gettin hurt or hurtin others. i had many regrets now. one is my studies. another one is volleyball. hmm. there's no point lookin back cos u cant make any changes. so now. i wish to make my decision wisely in wadever i do. no regrets are allowed. this is just somethin i wanted to blog for quite awhile. it popped into my mind just now. so here it is. tada.

here to blog again. tml's maths paper 2 and core geo. hope i can pass them. ate choc just now. its so nice. hahas.cant eat too much. if not i'll fall sick before i finish my exams. hahas. nth much to blog bout. think i'll update tml again. hahas.

best luck to ppl out there =)

well well. finished my maths paper 1 today. wow. great. it simply sucks. not because the paper was difficult or something. mainly wad that i didnt finish memorizin all the formulas. for once in these 2 yrs i can say a maths paper is easy. hmm. this is the most confident paper i sat for this whole yr. i realised something recently. actually maths is easy. all u gotta do is practice more and rmb all the formulas. ta da. and u're done wid it. i dunno why i took mi so loongg to figure out this. wow. all these coming from mi. i noe. its quite surprising. hhas. its hectic isn't it? papers comin all at one go and suddenly u realise. wad am i doing for this pass yrs.

anyways. thanks to the ppl teachin mi and tryin to stuff info into my brain. its workin. dun worry. hahas. im tryin to buck up. last min yes. haas. but. ohh well. best luck to everyone out there.

i feel like going to church again. how long has it been since i went there? i dunno. its been quite awhile. hmm. missed the songs we sang to praise God early in the mornin on sundays. church camps especially. it all started thru a tuition. hmm. uncle tony and auntie... oops. it been 4 - 5 yrs. sorry. cant rmb her name. started thru tuition. next they organise a club for kids called kids club. its reeaaally fun. i totally missed it now. sad. but ohh well. after that they introduce us to this. bethesda christian centre. now its held every sunday 9 am at sun plaza cinema. ya. i learnt alot abt God and Jesus. i rmb i went to the camp. hmm. i think it was sec 2 or 3. the amazing race camp held at sentosa. i learnt abt how amazin His grace is. Grace: Receiving something that you do not deserve. ya. we're all sinners. yet He choose to forgive us over and over again. how great is God? Amen.

things are startin to change. no. i should say. alrdy changed. one that once was my good fren is abt to be gone. maybe gone. maybe wad was predicted last time is comin true. if im out of the sch. things will not remain the same. and im not the one not makin any effort to try remain things the same. its up to that person now.

like the incident that happened to jessie. sometimes through one little incident. u can see alot. find out alot. whether who is ur good fren. or who really cares. maybe the other party didnt think much abt their action. they dunno wad they did will hurt someone or make one realise somethin. its just one small little action. well. maybe this is somethin related to mi. mayb this is just somethin i just wanna write on. ya. whoever's readin dun think too much. hahas.

i miss the 838 gang. a lot.. the days we spent at the court. the chalets. this includes everyone. one by one gone. busy wid their own stuff. met up wid ralf just now. he's just as crappy as last time. still smokin. well. thats not surprising. hahas. anyway. hope can keep in touch wid everyone whom i nearly lost contact wid =)

my warning for other ppl now is. dun get near chaichin. she's a farkin petty, short temper, insensitive, crazy gal. stay the freakin hell away from her.

well. everythin u wrote or send or do make mi think that way. rmb those msgs u sent. imagine i sent them to u. see how u'll think. its hard to say here. just hope things wun change. i've alrdy tried to remain everythin the same as last time.


come on. just typin a few letters is not that difficult rite.

can u stop it. who ever said things had change or wad? i still treat u as my best fren. but if u wanna change that den wad can i say? things had nvr change for mi. i dunno when u start thinkin that im ignorin u or wad. no one can replace ur position isn't that obvious. please lar. i really dun get why u're actin like this. its such a sudden change in attitude. if i done anythin wrong say it straight to my face and i'll apologise. dun start a cold war suddenly. i wanna clear this instead of losin a good fren in just one day. its crazy.


its practical exam tml. im so not prepared for it. hahas. preparin to fail. lol.


if it doesn't make a difference who is around in life den i wun be tryin so hard to keep in contact. the most important thing in life is who is around mi.

woots. here to blog again. nth much to blog lar. just keepin it alive only. hahas. anyway. watched stay alive today. its quite okae. but i wun consider it as my favorite show. not that im sayin its a bad show. its personal opinion. hahas. quite interestin though. how a person can die the same way as how they died in the game. hmm. hahas.


feel like going to the beach these few days. go sun tanning. im gettin fairer. ohh gosh. hahas. will be draggin amilia to go wid m someday. but exams are gettin nearer. dun think will be going now bah. lol.


good luck to everyone out there for the upcomin exams. jiayou wor=)

occ pool. that big big spider. hahas. ytd saw purple shirt. bugis edge. choice of 2. chose 1. hahahs. just abt 6 metre from the lift...

feel better le. maybe because i vent my anger alrdy or somethin. sorry to those who i had lost temper at. thanks to brendan for cheerin mi up unknowingly. LOLS.

how to describe how i feel now? feel like cryin. feel like cuttin myself. feel like punchin someone. just feel so down. the wall is fuckin hard. got my knuckles all red. no mood to eat. been starvin myself. even though im really hungry.


blog is mine. i'll write wadever i wan. dun like wad u see. dun look.



ahhhh!!!!!!!!!

how to describe how i feel now? feel like cryin. feel like cuttin myself. feel like punchin someone. just feel so down. the wall is fuckin hard. got my knuckles all red.



ahhhh!!!!!!!!!

if only there are no problems in this world. how peaceful life would be.





if i die tml. will anyone notice?

shagg day today. drag myslf to sch and still feel like sleepin.... well blah blah blah. lets skip the borin part. hahs. fast forwarrddd ---)

after sch. went to jessie house to make cookies for teachers' day tml. it was rainin very heavily. by the time we reach dere. we were all wet. lol. i went dere to put my heavy bag first. den when we were abt to go out. we spent so much time fightin for a slipper. dumb her. dun even hav a proper slipper to wear on a rainy day. in the end to be fair. we both wore sch shoes - . - hahas. had quite alot of fun in cold storage. hahas. cant find the stuff we wan and we kept askin. lol. and the paper cup we wanted. we had walked rite pass them. hahas. anyway. reached her house le. we started doing. meltin the 3 bar of chocolate was tough man. in the end i think we overcook a little little bit. its stil nice okae. dun misunderstand. hahahahs. here all the photos of the cookies that are done and wrapped.

this was half and was preparin to put all into the small paper cups

abt to be done le..

i noe. looks disgustin. but its nice =)

finally... wrappin is done too. hahs

felt so satisfied wid myself. jessie too. hahas. hope the teachers will enjoy it tml bah.

made one pack for amilia. she says its nice but a little too sweet. well. as long as its nice.. hahas. made one more pack. but that person was uncontactable. okae. im leavin it till tml. if not den too bad bah. anyway. went dota-ing wid amilia jowell and their fren jia jun. ahahs. nearly won both matches..

im tired le. feel like sleepin soon. will blog soon. goodnight!=)

rmb the nasi lemak and 1 litre of barley from abc to 839. causeway point. stadium. the block near stadium.. . doubt all these are remembered.


give mi a correction tape. cos i rmb.



i hate sotong now.


some stupid story from some stupid drama. dun mind mi pls.

ooh. im here to update. had abit of prob to come here cos there's no mouse for mi to use. ahh!! my comp is finally okae. but due to my stupid brothers who had to 'bodyguard' the comp for 24 hours. my mum pulled out the mouse. now it cant work. all thanks to them. im going crazy tryin to fix it. dumb.


anyway. stop all my rantings le. went out wid huimin just now. very long didnt go out wid her le. hahas. its like findin an old fren bac. hahs. i'll continue this tml. cant do anythin without a mouse. its like the cat had eaten the mouse. arghh!


okae. bac to update le. overall. its fun yesterday

bought this yesterday. hahas.

first photo i took wid her wor. lols. in train going bac le

ahh! my parents simply sucks! wad the hell is so wrong abt sleepin wid ur door CLOSE that they had to chain up the door knob to wadever. and the tv plug locked. wad the hell. crazy lar. if i really dare to leave this house. i will. as if we're some prisoner or dog. might as well go buy a chain and lock all of us to their hands. CRAZY LAR!!!

here to blog le. finally. hahahas. learn from my didi. due to the popular demand for mi to update..... im here to update. ahahaaha! no lar. dun be so bhb. lols.


went to ton for the last 2 days. my mum's killin mi soon le. lols. going out wid ms wong huimin later. wanna go take pay still need to drag someone along. i noe she very rich lar. dun nid like this show off one rite. hehe. k lar. i'll update when i come bac later.


hopefully will. . . hehe =)

finally.. after waitin for 2 weeks. i got the fone bac from the very ' resonable' teacher MS KAUR. she gav it bac herself without mi askin it from her. well. at least this made mi feel less hateful towards her. anyway. overall. she still nvr will be my fav teacher. ha.


went zhen's house yesterday. miss the phantom of opera cos i went late *sob sob* =( . been lookin forward to watch this show. hmm. i'll get someone to burn it for mi den. didi. must help mi ahh. hahas. yesterday was okae. i didnt get to swim cos i didnt bring extra clothin due to mi thinkin its very ma fan. hahas. that made mi miss the fun. lol. hmm. night went to kfc to eat and nas and ningsi went bac home first. leavin mi hend ah yew zhen xinyi and mao. i watched the benchwarmers wid hend and zhen's parents while the rest was in zhen's room playin cs. the show's not bad even though its quite idiotic. hahahs. after the show we went in to join those guys and i played a few rounds. at first i really sucks at it. i've became rusty le! lol. at the last few rounds it was still quite okae. hahs. was suppose to be there to celebrate birthday for sam. but he was very late. didnt even catch a glimpse of the birthday boy. well. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAM! hahas. dun think he'll see this anyway.


hey guys. im not a hair rapist okae. who ask all ur hair keep standin and it looks temptin to mess up ur hair. hahas xD


i dunno how things are now. is it good or bad. lol

ooh. been quite awhile since i updated my blog. blame it on my laziness. anyway there's nth much to update. sat was hj birthday. went out wid a few ppl to celebrate. arghh! lost my fone that day. so mood spoiling lar. lols. im soo careless. so angry wid myself. should hav look after my stuff properly. dumb dumb dumb..

wad am i doing? i hav no idea either. hai

went shoppin for the last 2 days. hahahs. cleared quite alot of stuff le. lols.

- shoppin list

those done:

• shoes
• wallet (both thanks to someone. lols)
• belt
• clothes / top

now im left wid a shorter shoppin list=) hahas.

1. clothes / bottom
2. bag (maybe)
3. ...
4. ...
5. ...
6. last but not least ipod shuffle

went to marina square on thurs. quite long didnt go dere so its not that borin. hahas. went orchard yesterday. someone bought a levis jeans wor. lols. $100+. wow. hahahas. went home at 3 plus. AM. hahas. and i gotta wake up at 5 30am for work. omg. i slept for like less den a hour and i got dragged up by my very wonderful mum. gag. lols. jk. anyway. felt like sleepin for the whole 4 hours while i repeat the same action over and over again. to pack the food into boxes. lols. very nice job. AND... now im finally home. woohoo! eat finish den go shower.. and bed. here i come ! hahhaahs.

I MISS AMILIA TOO! hmm. and EELIN! =)

THINK BEFORE U SPEAK!! ARGHH!!!

that hurts. if u didnt alrdy noe. if it really doesnt matter. den im nv doing it again. that'll be the last time. dun regret. if u think its makin mi happier. IT IS! THANK U VERY MUCH!!! argghhhh!!! wad the FUCK! forget it.



EELIN. faster come bac. i miss u alrdy! AMILIA too. no one to chat or accompany mi when im bored or feelin down. hai.

the bbq yesterday was great except for the fact that it rained and i got like bitten by.. err.. hundreds of mosquitoes.? hhas. ohh goshh! im scratchin all over and let mi just pray that it will not bleed and leave behind some very ugly lookin scars. im freakin itchy now. just imagine there's this cream or wadever crap i can think of that can remove mosquitoe bites in an instance. wow. i'll love the person who invented it(: anyway. gotta thank ningsi for draggin mi to the bbq. if not i'll miss the fun. im glad i went. hahas.


she's the man is really nice. it tells us to persue our dreams all the way even though it meant breakin the rules. eh. actually that's not really a very nice advice. lols. anyway. ya. do the impossible. even though u noe u will not succeed. at least u've tried ur best. woahh! cant believe im sayin this. hahahs.



hai. guys. im not worth for u guys to do things that will make only make mi happy. think of urself. its really not worth it u noe. u guys said its worth doing things for someone u love. but ... hai. u guys done alot for mi. im really happy. but im afraid to make a decision. i dun wanna hurt anyone.



suddenly the thought of o level creepin nearer and nearer silently and quickily rushed into my mind. i've slack for like 2 whole years and i think its enough. is it so hard to make myself study? im reminded of my 30 mins a day self study for a few times. wad happen to it? i just couldnt be bothered. how bout my maths? i told myself over and over again that i gotta buck up and start studyin. the worse thing is i keep thinkin that i still hav the time and i delay and messed up again. see wad happen to my mid yr. i noe i did study. but it was last min. like its gonna be any help to mi. sometimes i just wanna giv up on everything. drop out. put a stop to every difficult stuff that i faced. but i cant. its just a way of avoidin problems. eventually it'll just sneak bac up and scare u. ohh wadever crap. all these rantings here is not doing mi any good. i just gotta start actin instead of just plain sayin.



i miss church (: i dunno why. after such a long time of not going. hahs. just rmb to pray and hope God can take away some of my problems. Amen.

did i do the right thing? WAD is the right thing?

its been so long since i cried this long le. why is life always so unfair? i dun wan to lose anyone. by leavin mi is not gonna make mi any happier. its makin mi worse. it seems like all my fault that everything changed. maybe without mi everything would not hav started. sorry eelin for draggin u in. this doesn't even involve u. yet u seem to be the busiest person here.


wad should i do now?

Above all powers,

Above all kings,

Above all nature and all created things,

Above all wisdom and all the ways of man,

You were here before the world began.

Above all kingdoms,

Above all thrones,

Above all wonders the world has ever known.

Above all wealth and treasures of the earth,

There's no way to measure what You're worth.

Crucified

Laid behind a stone

You lived to die

Rejected and alone

Like a rose

Trampled on the ground

You took the fall

And thought of me

Above all

im gettin more and more frustrated le. its gettin no wher with all the thinkin. so why am i botherin?

gotta go sch tml. siian.. thanks to AUNTIE tay who agreed to help mi print. hahas.. so i dun hav to go search for a printer. gotta rmb to bring my floppy tml. work was quite tirin today. imagine pourin 1 thousand cups of fruit punch and refillin it like for 10 times.. its crazy. the ppl dere sure can drink alot. its sort of like the openin of the changi airport terminal 3. it seems quite nice.. wid the area surrounded by sunflower. speakin of that.. i brought one stalk home.. its really pretty. the yellow was very bright. hahas. took picture of the place too. changi airport. hmmm. remind mi of somethin. esplanade too. haiis. better stop thinkin of that now.


hmm.. hope hj wil hav a nice trip in china. hahas..
next i'll be sayin that to eelin.. lols. and be more brave.. somethin good will come out of it.. trust mi. im better wid other's prob den my own. lols..


HAIIS. in a worse state now. urgh! stupid. stupid. stupid. one worry is regrettin.. thats the worst part. one seems to care. one does'nt.
forget it.

chi o'level today.. not that difficult but the last passage was quite hard to understand..
well. as long as i dun fail i'll be happy enough. dun dare to hope for too much.. everytime i put my hope higher.. the more disappointed i'll get. its always like this.. anyway.. the hall was like north pole today.. everyone was freezin as the air con was blastin.. is there a need to on it that strong? lols.. and i didnt bring a jacket some more.. clever ain't i? lols..


in a state of confusion now. clearin my mind to think clearly.. how? advice pls ppl.. haiis.. i seriously dunno wad to do.. all i gotta do is to noe how i feel.. but how? whoo.. good for amilia.. her prob is solve.. blessings to u wor! lols..


- - the worst decision maker in the world

i wanna noe wad im thinkin. is it so hard to make a decision? everytime i try to think my mind is blank.. why? the more i think the more confuse i get.. arghh!! someone help mi please.. time is runnin out..


jiayou to everyone wor.. chi exam on mon.. hahas.. cannot flunk it.. gotta get at least A2 for it.. thats my target.. for the other subjects i dun dare to put too much hope on them.. ya..

im bac to blog.. lols.. it rottin here waitin for mi to blog.. hahas..


anyway..exams are almost over.. great..just one more day.. =)


ohh..im so sorry.. i forgot to send marlon a msg on his birthday and mother's day.. lols.. anyway... hope u hav a great day tml.. hahas.. lookin forward to enjoyin myself after 1 whole week of exam.. and i gotta make up my mind soon.. no more brain cells for that le.. hahas

haiis.. so disappointed.. aimin for 5 A/s for napfa de..in the end got 3 B/s and 2 A/s ..so i must get an A for 2.4 now.. hahas..jiayou to everyone else to wor..


went on a trip to semakau island.. the trip was borin lar.. nearly fell asleep on the boat.. it was so windy.. we're surrounded by sea when we reach dere.. it reminded mi so much of the beach.. hahas..must go to the beach one of these days.. took quite alot of photos today.. kinda expected lar..im surrounded by so many phototakin-lovers..hahhas.. includin mi lar..LOLS.. anyway.. although was quite tired i still enjoy it =)


very tired today.. dun think will blog any longer.. tata..

haiis..think i let down red house.. didnt go for any events at all.. sorry guys.. but i dun think im good anough to run anyway.. ya..


did i do the right thing?haiis.. think u're being very patient wid mi but....

anyway.....

skiiped sch because of the dumb hair todayy.. haiis.. was wonderin wher to go cos cant stay at home.. in the end went to hide at hj house.. lols.. slept for quite awhile den played the sims..hahhas..fun wor..its on ps2..find it more fun den comp de..hahs..after that was DEMANDED to do my work..so i did my maths for awhile..den i started to lose concentratiion.. and i drew a bugs bunny..cant believe it.. hahas..had a sense of satisfaction after i complete..LOLS..


ohh ya..nearly forgot.. thanks hui fen and jeanette for the present from china..the one with the hair which looks like JESSIE HO REN SHI!! hahahs..stupid dumbo..snatched the orange one from mi..end up with a blue one..hahas..make sure she SEE this!! hahahhas..

hope the six of us will last..... =))

top of the wish list

1. lose contact with everyone [they will be happier without mi]
2. ....
3. .....

hmm..let mi start bloggin abt wed first..went out to orchard to celebrate sw n fan birthday.. met at the mrt station..wads up wid sw n fan n shuting's reaction. lols..they said they nv seen mi wearin skirt before..hahhas..okae lar..maybe i didnt wear when im went out wid them bah..hahahs..hmmm..den we went off to orchard.. we told sw they all that marlon was not joinin us le..hehehe..in the end they went to food republic first..mi and jessie went to the "toilet"..they wanted to follow us too..lols..in the end we manage to persuade them to go the the food court first..we went down to meet marlon at the bread talk..bought a cake..anyway think sw was kinda expectin it..cos she was not really surprise by it and we were kinda suspicious..hahhas...sang song n eat the cake le they went to buy food.mi n jessie didnt cos we decided to eat in the cinema...after that went to cineleisure..watched the date movie..damn funny lar... we were laughin all the way..anyway..u could hear marlon's laughter..damn kua zhang lor the show..hahhas..hmmm..after the show we went shoppin around..waited for hend n yew to join us..hend went off before the show started cos he got TUITION...hhahs..okae...anyway...jessie...sw was just tellin mi how obvious hend was..not abt u lar..dunn think so much..hahahs..she didnt say wads wrong wid her..but kept really quiet all the way..haiis....got anythin u just say lar..hahas..sw wanted to go popular before we go bac...i knew it was at the station area..i led them there and in the end they did not believe i was right..sad man =( `cries....they were two escalator there..didnt now which was the right one that led to the popular..in the end both were okae to go dere...see guys..IM RIGHT!! hahahas.. went bac after sw bought wad she wants..met alvin for dinner at yishun as he was there for doctor appointment..WEAK LAR HE!! this is for him to see..hahahhs..hmmm..asshole him..scare mi wid a cockroach..dumb ass...anyway..on the way home we saw somethin......lols...see no evil n hear no evil..hhhahass..chatted wid him 4 or 5..dun rmb..workin the next day still dun wanna sleep..dumb ass lar..so weak le still liddat..lols



hmmm..yesterday went out wid hj..he lar...drag mi out...planned to sleep the whole day de..first he went to his camp to get cheque from his fren..$1900 wor..hahhas...after that went queensway to shop..didnt get anythin dere..went marina square instead..saw a shop i walk pass quite a nomber of times but didnt really went in to see..went in yesterday..wow!! found alot of really nice stuff..cant believe i didnt went in to hav a look before..anyway..inside was mostly handmade stuff usin beads , shells..ya.. bought a choker bah.. in the shape of a fish..hahhas..its really nice!!hahahs..went shoppin around and cant find anythin else to do le..in the end we went to watch dorm..before we went in to watch we went to eat pizza hut...ahhahas..its nice too..its been so long since i eat that..alvin came down to meet us..wasnt expectin him so didnt tell him we're gonna watch movie..so sorry..made u came for nth..dunno if he's angry anot..haiis...hmmm..the show at the beginnin was quite scary..cos of the sound bah...lols..in the end it was quite touchin...so its quite a good movie..must go watch...after that we went esplanade..theres a performance there..the singer was not bad..im more fascinated by the drums..hahhas..after that walk across the brigde and we sat down near the merlion there to talk..chatted for quite long and we went bac to the esplanade..was really thirsty so we wen to hav a drink..we drank coconut..the drink was warm..would hav prefer a cold one..lols..we join in the crowd at the perfomance dere after that ..the ppl was damn high dere lor as if we were in a club...everyone started dancin..!! wooohhhoo!!! hj was damn high lor..lols...after that we went in a pub bah..i wanted to drink..lols...first i drank mudslide..den another one was....i dunno the name..anyway..theres flame in it..woahh..so cool..after that we went bac to join the crowd..i wasn't really that high..okae nia..hj was the one going crazy..hahhas...haiis..den a fone call from my mum spoilt the mood...gotta go bac soon le..siian..went bac home le den chatted wid hj on the fone until 3..wanted to sleep de cos was really sleepy..but dunno why cant sleep..drank a can of tiger den quickly went to bed tryin to sleep..



haiis..miss the f&n remedial today cos i cant wake up..jessie mornin called mi..i ans the fone le den went bac to sleep..lols...ohhh...amilia came bac from camp le...how we enjoyed without her these few days....HAHAHHS...this is so gonna piss her off...dun kill mi please...
hahahhs



gonna sch reopen soon le wor...enjoy while we can..in the mean time...gotta study too...haiis...

sometimes i wonder.. wad if i didnt go down to 838.. didnt meet anyone of them.. wad will i be doing now.. will i be like wad amilia says.. become worse den now.. cos of ppl from my sch.. or will i be really good..?


its stupid questions i'll nv get answers...

wad the fcuk is wrong wid everyone in this so-call family.. maybe i should leave if im not gettin along wid them..why should i be the one doing wad they wan.. all they think abt is themselves.. wadever lar.. my brothers are the best.. the five of them are family..please exclude mi if u wan a perfect family..ya..


damn tired now..slept at five.. was workin last night.. eelin nearly lost her fone.. she dropped it at the rest.. thanks to lei seng xiu yuan n the others in the rest..if not she'll nv find it..she was like so worried when she realised her fone was missin.. lols.. anyway..by the time we got to the station.. there was no more train le.. in the end we took the cab bac.. haiis..$10 gone.. after that we went to eat at yishun.. on the way bac walkin pass the mrt station.. dewei haojie ak at the opp side of the road..they were comin bac from clubbin..seems like fun..hahhs..think they enjoyed alot bah..


im so aware that im showin attitude these few days.. i hav no idea wad the hell is wrong wid mi..please ignore mi..i hav a fcukin bad attitude. i laughed even harder after i got scoldings from 3 diff teachers.. sick aren't i? let mi call the mental hospital..i really should book a room dere for myself.. ya..anyway im so sorry to those whom i showed attitude to.. darn mi.. i nearly laugh till i cry.. kinda stupid.. who am i?

ohh nooo.. im still slackin..omfg.. buck up please! im worried that im NOT worried for o level..ohh gosh...thats not a gd sign...NONONO...

anyway..now im figurin out a place to go..gotta get out of this damn house..


someone suggest a place please?

ohh..crap crap crap..exams are drawin nearer n nearer.. lol.. took a real stupid chi exam paper.. hmm.. 154 mcq and 15 other questions.. fell asleep while sittin in the lecture theatre.. cant believe it.. i could fall asleep while sittin..wow.. realise it today.. hahas.. anyway.. was real tired today..


oh gosh..my photos sucks.. its a last min thing.. gotta hand in by 3 today.. the lightnin was not that gd either.. ohh well..nvm..handed in 3 and one was given to jessie..she said she would look after it for mi.. hahas.. she'll giv it to mi when i need it.. so kind of her..AHEM!



some stupid dumb ass ask mi wad does alot of pimples on someone face means.. guess the ans..



it means the person is constipated..all the toxicity goes to the pimples..


dumb rite?


asked by a dumb person--

im achin all over.. oh gosh.. all because of the cross country.. got 25th.. so lousy.. got such lousy result and i get muscle ache as a reward.. hmm..not bad..lols..


dun feel like going home anymore.. just dun belong there..



stupid miie

oh gosh.. its just one day without my handphone and i cant stand it.. now i realise the real impotance of my phone to me.. i simply just need my handphone ! seriously cant live without it.. hahahs..


sorry to those who were findin mi today.. didnt realise that until quite late.. thats the prob without phone.. haiis..


wads the prob wid parents? is their job really to scold their children or wad? or they just simply cant live without scoldings? i really wonder *thinkin hard* ... maybe one of their job is to let mi hate them.. yepp.. maybe.... and they had done a really GOOD job abt it.. *claps for them*

didnt noe final fantasy was so nice.. cloud damn shuaii lor..hmm..think too much le..hahahs..


went east coast today..abit borin lar.. but the main point of the outin was to celebrate ah mi la's birthday.. hmm.. think it was really surprisin.. lols.. yeah=) suceeded..the ice cream cake we bought was hard as stone.. haven melted lar. i think the person juz gave us ice cake.. forgot to giv us the cream..hahhas.. hmmm..got to roller blade today..its been so long since i hav done that.. blame it on venelyn faith.. lols..went aus.. can use her blade..mine spoilt.. hahahhas...hope she dun see this.. =)


shagg..tml got sch again.. tired man.. hahhahs..

hmm..quite tired today..went out at 3 plus meet hj at mrt station.. went orchard.. was lookin for pen..those that name can be engrave..search for so long.. ah.. in the end found it... at.... ehh..not tellin.. hahahs.. cant type here.. lols.. anyway..after that went lido to see if got any show to watch..the show were all quite late..so we went cine instead.. gosh..so many ppl dere..all the shows ard 7 plus were either sellin fast or sold out.. hmm..finally..we decide to go great world city..hj figure that the place was quite deserted so wun hav a lot of ppl.. wrong..the shows were sellin fast too..hmm..watch rumor has it in the end..the show was not bad..cant figure why ppl say its not nice..


anyway..going picnic at east coast tml..hahahs..so long nv go picnic-ing le..lols..


haiis..why my frens all got so much prob de? oso cant solve for them.. only can listen to them if they nid someone to tok to.. ya.. sad lar.

hmm.. lazy to blog recently.. gotta type so much..


okae..update abt yesterday first.. cchy against woodlands ring.. haiis..lost..2nd round lost by 1 point.. sad =( ..they could win de lor.. haiis..the match against sembawang too.. maybe its juz fate bah.. everytime u think u could win.. u will lose in the end.. hav no idea why this concept apply to our sch. anyway.. AMOST everyone cried.. except for that SOMEONE.. hmm.. juz hope that they will win on tues agianst evergreen.. JIAYOU wor !!


went k box today.. with the usual gang.. took quite alot of photos..lols.. after that we went to amk to play pool.. took photos there too.. seems like we're takin photos wherever we go.. hahs.. so tired today.. slept at 5 plus last nite.. lols


hmmm..wonderin wad to do tml.. bored..

have you ever spare a thought for mi before ?

arghhh!!! im going crazy.. !! my parents n grandmother..wad the hell is their prob?? they keep thinkin of all the things i do wrong..did they ever think any gd things abt mi? no.. when i've problems wid frens or something..did they ever spare a thought for mi for mi to be alone or something?? no again.. wad they wan?? kill mi lar.. do it den .. take a chopper or wadever they wan!! im going crazy !! all they noe is scold scold scold..!! fine..!

HAPPY VALENTINE DAY to everyone!! heex =) its 12 am le..

Cresting the skyway brow
Suddenly there stands a crowd
A host of gleaming towers
Black at the roots
Nematodes
Shriveled in their shadows, walking



Wild Einstein clouds
Expound from shocking top corners
Falling, falling relatively through blue



As I did for you



Time expands, reeling
Space folds down, diminished
To strings and wormholes
Without your warm, certain presence
In three, wholesome dimensions



I am all at sea with these buildings
Unless you anchor me
You, my gravitational constant
Telling me up from down
So I may walk through the valleys
Of my home planet
Keeping balance
Between rooted earth, adventuring sky.

who i am

-------------

not because of who i am ,

but because of what You've done ,

not because of what i've done ,

but because of who You are ,

i am flower quickly fading ,

here today & gone tomorrow ,

a wave tossed in the ocean ,

a vapor in the wind ,

still You hear me when i'm calling ,

Lord , u catch me when i'm falling ,

& You've told me who i am -

I am Yours .

woahh!! bought quite alot of stuff yesterday.. gals outin!! haha.. wid amilia n eelin only.. yepp..dewei in the end cant make it cos of his birthday.. went orchard first.. cos eelin da xiao jie wanna repair her fone.. plus the eatin time we spent 2 hours juz doing both things..hmm..shopped at far east until 3 4 plus nah..den we went over to marina square..went there the 3rd time still mi lu.. haiis.. was findin the little match girl shop for so long..shagg..hmm.. anyway finally bought the pouch mi n jessie wanted.. helped her buy first.. cos went to meet her n hend afterwards.. going to zhen house at 7.. ya..


skip everything..fast forward to his house...


zhen's house is so cool.. makes mi so jeAlous =x hahaha.. anyway ate yu sheng there.. didnt like it.. not because the food is not nice..pls dun misunderstand.. juz that i dun like it.. haha.. hmmm..drank one can of tiger beer there.. was tired so drink le abit drunk ya.. but still wide awake lar..didnt manage to bang into any wall.. lols.. the guys threw hend into the pool..lols.. a funny sight it was.. hmm.. went off ard 9 30 liddat..cos jessie gotta meet her mummy.. nana gotta go home early too.. siian.. went to meet amilia after that..ate mac.. was so hungry.. hahas


dewei they all went k box today.. siian.. nv go.. too many ppl le.. now zi bi at home.. nth better to do le..lols

woahh!! bought quite alot of stuff yesterday.. gals outin!! haha.. wid amilia n eelin only.. yepp..dewei in the end cant make it cos of his birthday.. went orchard first.. cos eelin da xiao jie wanna repair her fone.. plus the eatin time we spent 2 hours juz doing both things..hmm..shopped at far east until 3 4 plus nah..den we went over to marina square..went there the 3rd time still mi lu.. haiis.. was findin the little match girl shop for so long..shagg..hmm.. anyway finally bought the pouch mi n jessie wanted.. helped her buy first.. cos went to meet her n hend afterwards.. going to zhen house at 7.. ya..



skip everything..fast forward to his house...



zhen's house is so cool.. makes mi so jeAlous =x hahaha.. anyway ate yu sheng there.. didnt like it.. not because the food is not nice..pls dun misunderstand.. juz that i dun like it.. haha.. hmmm..drank one can of tiger beer there.. was tired so drink le abit drunk ya.. but still wide awake lar..didnt manage to bang into any wall.. lols.. the guys threw hend into the pool..lols.. a funny sight it was.. hmm.. went off ard 9 30 liddat..cos jessie gotta meet her mummy.. nana gotta go home early too.. siian.. went to meet amilia after that..ate mac.. was so hungry.. hahas


dewei they all went k box today.. siian.. nv go.. too many ppl le.. now zi bi at home.. nth better to do le..lols

You turned my darkness into light,

You made everything all right.

You picked me up when I was down,

You turned my life around.

If I didn't have you, what would I be?

A blessing is what you are to me.

When I needed you the most, you were there,

Even if it seemed like you didn't care.

When I didn't think I could make it another day,

You chased all my doubts away.

If I didn't have you, what would I be?

A treasure is what you are to me.

The world is full of many people,

it's true,

But there is only one of you.

You fill my heart with love;

You're a God-sent gift from above.

If I didn't have you, what would I be?

An angel is what you are to me.

Lost and alone,

I will no longer be,

Because you are here with me.

There is no reason to be sad,

You've taken away all the bad.

If I didn't have you, what would I be?

A best friend is what you are to me!!

___________..xOx..___________

im not supposed to love yo0

im not supposed to care

im not supposed to live my life wishing you were there

im not supposed to wonderwhere you are or what you doim

sorry, I can't help myself

cause im in love with you

___________..xOx..___________

As you sit in silence,

Wondering whyI'll be your shoulder to cry on

Until your tears run dry.

When you've been hurt,

And can't believe what they've done

If you need someone to talk toI'll be the one.

If a close friend hurts you,

And you don't understandRemember I'm here,

I'll lend a helping hand.

Burdens are lighter when carried by two,

And I just want you to knowI'm here for you.

___________..xOx..___________

hmm.. went to work yesterday straight after sch.. maybe not exactly right after lar.. juz went home to bathe n i went out le. damn tirin workin at banquet.. long hours plus the wadever boss or who was so damn irrtatin.. scolded us all for nth.. kept shoutin at ppl.. is it that nice to scold others i wonder?.. anyway..earn some money lar.. hahahas.. went to hj house wid amilia ard 12.. actually wanted to go off at 2 liddat de.. but fell asleep.. in the end i went home at 9 plus this mornin.. got nag by my mum of cos.. thats so not surprisin.. lol..


hmm.. going shoppin later... hahaha...


HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEWEI!! owe u 21 sheets of tissue.. =)

TIRED-

xD


anyway..happy birthday fei min!! hahaha..

glad i went sch today.. if not i wld hav wasted all their effort..omg.. cant believe i got trick by them..anyway..its a gd surprise.. jessie n siaowei are such WONDERFUL actresses.. beautiful show they had put up..lol..


anyway i wanna thank..jessie siaowei si fan cerelia jesslyn lip min shu ting..for everything they had done...muackks!!..im soo touched! HAHA.. sorry for my attitude yesterday..haiis


hmm..one more thing..thanks to dewei my blogskin had been changed..heex..i lurve it!! haha..lousy guy...rest more ya..later get even worse..exam comin soon...

heyy..sorry guys for my attitude yesterday.. dunno wads wrong with mi.. miss out alot on the bbq.. ehh dewei..the facial wash was not bad wor..lol.. didnt even eat the cake den kena sabo by dewei n hj.. ass.. chalet was quite fun even though not as fun as the last chalet we had.. room was still cramp.. haha.. not suprisin.. thats the same type of room we had last yr.. didnt sleep at all yesterday nite.. sat at the pool side the whole nite.. im like the food to the mosquitoes dere.. got so many mosquitoes bites.. den ard 6 liddat mi chun kit n dewei went to the beach.. was quite cold dere too. sad.. didnt manage to see the sunrise.. haiis.. ohh ya.. was quite unlucky on the sat.. it rained as we are abt to go to the beach..haiis.. but still had fun.. think i got a little sun tan..wahaha.. wan make jessie jealous.. haha!! played vb.. sad.. cant go in the water..haiis..


anyway.. the chalet is still fun n thanks for the presents too.. the vb amilia hj n eelin gav really was suprisin.. haha.. n the necklace n ear rings was nice too.. heex =)



838 rawkks!!

arghh!! even more piss now.! stupid com...now at chalet.. keypad so hard to press..damn.. how come its my birthday n i dun even feel like im enjoyin..hmm.. gd for dewei lar.. haha.. seems to be enjoyin himself for his birthday celebration.. haha.. im at a chalet now n i dun even hav the mood to be in.. lol.. funny uh.. dunno lar..damn bed so hard somemore..

nvm nvm... dunno why im complainin anyway.. forget it.. happy birthday to mi..wahaha... siian.....!!!


got bitten by so many mosquitoes..

hmmm..update abt yesterday bah..dewei n mi acc eelin to paya lebar to look at wig..would u BELIEVE it?? wig..lol.. okaes ..nvm.. decided or a long time n in the end she finally decided to cut... thank goodness! hahaha.. went bugis to shop after that..was waitin for hj so we went to eat..hj bought a new hp..w900i!! makes mi so jealous =x haiis...i oso wan..lol.. hmm.. eelin bought 2 bags..hp pouch n strap..mi only bought a bag..necklace..cd..yepp..didnt manage to buy clothes..no time to shop...haiis..ak came to meet us too after work..den before going home..eelin went to QB house to cut her hair..cut until very style lar..but abit funny lei..lol..she looks like a sec one gal after the hair cut..hahahaha..was teasin her all the way yesterday..lol..


hmm..going to shop for the chalet stuff today...dewei got a brand new watch from his bro...whhooo! another thing to make mi jealous..lucky him..got a hp from his sis too nt long ago...lucky 21! haha...

whee!! it feels gd to be bloggin on my own com again.. thanks to jianhui who helped mi to fix this 'clever' com of mine..

haiis..plannin to go bugis wid eelin today in the afternoon de..but she last min could not go..haiis..cuz of her mum..den was so bored at home..in the end went over to her house to watch the wig..dots..quite scary..but den it was more disgustin den scary..yupp..after tt went to watch fearless wid jianhui..wanted to watch memoirs of geisha at first..but in the end change to fearless...very nice the show!! ppl out dere..u gotta watch this movie..!!after that went to eat.. heex..JH came my house to fix my com after eatin..and the problem is.........one stupid little wire was spoiled! omg..spent so long tryin to figure out the prob n it was juz the wire that went wrong..arghh!! now havin another problem..no sound from my com..ass..haiis..looks like i hav to trouble jh again..haha..owe him a meal without abalone now..haha..

sch tml..haiis..

can i take leave tml?

late for sch today..gotta stand at the parade square for one period..stupid mr eng..den went in physics class late..i was still sick so i felt like sleepin throughout the whole lesson..den some more i ate the flu medicine liz gave mi..made mi so drowsy..the worst lesson was the chi periods..the mdm goh was fuckin naggy man..gotta listen to her for the whole 3 periods..lost my temper at her today..haha..

went nyp in the afternoon..some of the courses were cool..esp the design ones..but dun hav the ones im interested in..so sad..or else nyp is so near..wha ha ha..dun hav to travel so far..

going to go bac sch decorate class tml..so early..!!den after that going to TP open house..think will be much better den nyp..haha..

yeah =) im touchin the comp again..heex..okae..finally updatin my blog again..

nth much happen in sch today lar..crap alot wid nana jessie n zhenyu..lol..muz start going to sch regularly le..cannot ponten liao..yepp..

now decidin whether i should go nyp tml or the modular sports or wadever crap tml..teach volleyball?..errr...hahas..

went mac wid jessie after sch today..chatted alot..hahaha..but so sad..someone got tuition..haha..den went to play vb wid amilia..poor her..gotta keep pickin the ball cuz of my lousy ball skills..haha..

feelin so tired now..still gotta plan for the chalet thing..siian..no one wanna confirm wid mi whether they're going anot..sad=( wadever...leave it to dewei to plan it all..wha ha ha..